:: skeletons in the closet ::

I have been thinking about how to blog this without losing some friends along the way. My former lecturer just got married to his ex-student. I've met the bride on one occasion before the wedding. Great lady. Pretty, friendly and a very giving person. My lecturer? He is a man I looked up to and whose lessons I always anticipated. He loved a good discussion and every once in a while, tries to stirs that within his student to think beyond the surface. What I liked most about him was that he always kept a very open disposition where he makes things very clear from the start- how he would grade us- very strictly, that is- and all those things that other lecturers really couldn't be bothered with. He was like a friend to most of us. Infact, he would call me sometimes and we could chat up to an hour at length.

Things began to change when it became apparent that he was looking for more than a friendship. This, despite the fact that we were both seeing other people and that he was a good 20 years older than me! Obviously, nothing of that sort ever materialized. I never reciprocate and grew cautious of his intentions. When it became clear there was no room in the romantic department, we sort of became ok friends again. Just no more long chats. He would keep in touch with me once in a while and he even tried to land me an intern position in a well-know media company. That was quite some time back and we kept in touch sporadically. Then, last month, he sent me an email to announce he was getting married to his long-time girlfriend. I attended the wedding, which was a rather intimate, elaborate affair. I was the only student from my school to attend.

The wedding was all nice and dandy and all the sweetest things. But imagine my surprise when I found out during the wedding that he had infact, been married before and had 3 kids from his previous marriage. All this while, the phone conversations, never once had he broached the subject of his kids nor his former marriage. 3 kids is a big, big secret to keep. How naive of me to think I knew him well. We always had the impression this was a man who was too pre-occupied with his work and not really seriously dating. So that was a shocker. I still respect this man alot- he had the smarts, had loads of character and is doing very well for himself. What I could not get over was how well he concealed his skeletons and his reasons for doing so. This incident definitely jolted me abit and let me rethink about trusting people so easily again. Talk about beyond the surface.